|The following are different accounts of
George Bernard Shaw's "dinner definition" of a prostitute
George Bernard Shaw once said to a young lady, "Would you sleep with me for
$5,000?" She was flustered but finally answered "Yes." Then Shaw asked "Would
you sleep with me for $5?" She said "Mr. Shaw, what kind of girl do you think
I am?" Shaw smiled. "We've already determined that. Now we're haggling price."
[GEORGE BERNARD SHAW]
I have heard that George Bernard Shaw once asked a woman if she would go
to bed with a man for 1,000 pounds. She said that she thought that she would.
Shaw then asked whether she would do it for two pounds.
"What do you think I am?" she said.
"We've already determined that," he replied; "now we're haggling over the
I'm reminded of an apocryphal story that is sometimes attributed to George
Bernard Shaw and sometimes Groucho Marx. Mark Twain has probably received
credit for it as well. Doesn't matter.
The story is: At a very elegant dinner party The Author/Humorist was seated
next to a very grand lady who thought herself hot stuff. The Author/Humorist
turned to the woman between courses, and asked, "Madam. Would you consider
sleeping with me for a million dollars?"
The woman blanched and blushed, and perhaps fanned herself. Then she responded,
"Well, my, for a million dollars? I suppose I would."
At the end of the next course, the gentleman(?) turned to the woman again
and said, "Madam, would you sleep with me for a quarter?"
"What!," she exploded. "Sir! What do you take me for?"
"Oh, I know what you are, Madam. We are just haggling about the price."